Running Buddies

Over the years, I have personally struggled with the terms “introvert” and “extrovert”. In my professional career, I often had to take personality tests and on questions related to my social interactions the results tended to fall into that proverbial category, “It depends”.

In many regards, I consider myself an introvert. I can be a loner and quite frankly, I’m OK with that. Maybe I’m blessed in that I am comfortable in my own skin. That’s not to say that I’m always happy with myself – by no means! Trust me, I have my moments of self-doubt, I have my share of regrets and I’ve experienced plenty of old fashion Catholic guilt for my past wrong doings. And while the voices in my head may keep me up some nights, all in all, I can keep fairly good company with myself.

Looking back, I think I’ve always been somewhat of an introvert. When my older brother moved away I had access to all his albums and I would put the headphones on and listen to Dylan, Croce, Neil Diamond and Mac Davis for hours! I enjoyed my alone time with my music and that time would stimulate my thoughts and my dreams.

And while I loved my alone time, I was also blessed with plenty of friends growing up. Good friends. Sincere friends. Friends you could trust. Friends who had your back. I can’t say I had a single best friend – a buddy I was joined at the hip with – I just had a lot of good buddies. And I played a lot of team sports with coaches who instilled teamwork and I was taught to value being a part of something bigger than the individual.

As with most things in life, there needs to be balance – and as a kid I somehow found it – I learned to enjoy and appreciate the company of friends while also learning how to be OK alone in the company of only myself.

When I first began competitive running in high school it was all about “team”. We trained together, we raced together, we hung out together. Larry, Ed, Dono, Duke, Carlos….we had a lot of good times.

Unfortunately for most competitive runners, after their school years are over, their “team” days are also over. Then throw in the fact that most folks have to grow up and go work for a living, and before you know it their running days are also over.

If you’re lucky enough to stick with the sport or come back to it like I did, you find out that it’s not quite the same regarding the “team”. Quite frankly you spend a lot of time alone. Alone with yourself and all your thoughts. There is an expression (a book title actually), “The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner” which says it all. If you are going to run and if you are going to run marathons you better get used to running alone. To some degree you need to be an introvert to be a successful runner. You have to be OK with being alone with your thoughts because you’re going to be spending a lot of time with them! For many, this is exactly what they are looking for with running – some alone time after a hectic day at work or after dealing with whatever stresses they may have in their life. When I returned to running, I found my alone time again. Running provided a balance in my life. Running became my time. My time to meditate. My time to resolve my life problems. My time to reflect and count my blessings.

But running also brought something else back into my life. When I got back into running I didn’t spend much time hitting the 5K’s and 10K’s – I jumped right into a marathon! For my first marathon, I trained in solitude with many miles on a treadmill in the basement – it was painful and not much fun! The next year, as I was about to begin training I made a negative comment to a co-worker about the treadmill and he suggested I join him and a few others for a lunch time run. We could pound out a few miles and with a nice fitness center available to us we could shower up after and be back to work within an hour or so.

So I took him up on the offer – one of the best running decisions I ever made!

For the next four years, I trained with the greatest group of runners – it was the highlight of my workday. We pushed each other and we enjoyed each other’s accomplishments. It was like I was back on a team again. Near the end of my employment at that hell hole I would often be drinking my morning coffee and complaining to my wife about having to go to work and she would respond, “well, at least you have your lunch time running buddies!” And she was right. Bill - my “Sensei”– over 200 marathons under his belt and the man who paced me to my first qualifying time for Boston. Cheryl - a 2:45 marathoner who ran in the US Olympic Trials in her day! K2 (another Kevin) – committed to running marathons for charity and always worth a laugh or two on the run. Art – one of the most gifted athletes I’ve ever known and also the most humble. Pete, Walter, Clarke, Marc G…. We had some great runs and while I don’t miss that place of employment one bit, I truly miss those lunch time running buddies – my team.

After those days, I somehow ended up with my current gang. Somewhere along the way a few of us started doing track workouts together and since we were all old guys from the same town we dubbed ourselves the “Agawam Masters Track Club”. Rich “The Ageless Wonder” is still punching out 3:30 marathons in his 60’s and who along with my Sensei, paced me to my first Boston Qualifier. The “Beast” was recovering from a broken foot when we started running together but now he’s the leader of the pack with an amazing 2:59 marathon this past year. The other original member of the AMTC was Brian “The Billy Goat”. Brian was just coming into his own, posting some great results when out of nowhere his knee seized up on him and his running career was over. Brian always set the example at those track workouts – not only would he never cut them short, but no matter how hard they were he would always get us to end with a few hill repeats. We miss him out there but we think of him often as our “hill repeats” are now named “McCarthy’s” in his honor. When “Peter Rabbit” (named from the pace he sets) joined us we waived our residency rule – he was from the next town over but his kid played sports in our town so we made an exception for him. Once we waived the residency rule we somehow lowered our standards across the board and “Boy Wonder” and the “Racing Junkie” joined us. “Boy Wonder” I’ve written about before – a kid with a ton of talent who loves hearing stories of Boston and will be running it someday soon. And then there’s the “Racing Junkie”. When he joined us all he ever did was race 5K’s. And by that I mean the only runs he would ever go on would be a race and he would race five times a week and never train! And when I say race, I mean race – this guy knows only one speed - all out and he is a competitor who hates to lose. But we’ve been getting through to him and he’s cut back a little on the racing and is “training” more. Now he even goes out for easy runs occasionally! And every now and then we are joined by some southern boys from Connecticut, Stevie V and Doug, which just adds more diversity to the group. If they show up a little more this summer I’m sure we’ll come up with some good nicknames for them.

And then there’s me - the introvert who loves going for his long runs and sinking deep into thought, reflecting on the past and planning for the future. But also, the extrovert who loves being a part of a team and can chew anyone's ear off over a 10 mile run! A runner who loves training with his buddies – buddies that have challenged me and pushed me and have helped me accomplish my running goals – buddies that have been there through my injuries and have encouraged me when I’ve been down – buddies that have been there for me through layoffs, unemployment and my parent’s passing - buddies that are an integral part of the balance in my life and are simply the best.

For so many reasons running is a great pastime and I encourage everyone to give it a try. And if along your running journey you can join in with others and find your own running buddies it will be even more special.

Running buddies are special – Long may they run!